Giving Up

Giving up

Giving in

There isn’t anymore fight left in me

Tried

But so weak




Nothing seems to matter

Keep messing up

A hole dug for myself

Deeper and deeper I go

When will I hit rock bottom?

When will pain end?




Nobody said life is easy

Never thought it to be this hard




Spiraling out of control

Reaching for a knife

Scissors

Something sharp




Cut my skin

Blood slowly seeps out

Feels so good

The only way I know

Showing people what’s going on inside




My flesh my canvas

The cuts my artwork

Disturbing to some

Soothing to me




Taking out my anger

So familiar

So Comforting

Self-destruction, my friend

Helps me feel

I know I’m alive

My release




The scars remind me of my stupidity

People don’t understand

That’s okay

It’s my secret thing.

© Melissa Isbell, December 2005